literature

What Holiday?

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Published: Dec 20, 2015

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Literature Text

Thanksgiving?
I ate a piece of pie and rushed off to check out
people who didn't have enough things to be thankful for yet.
Christmas Eve?
I scanned and bagged everyone else's Christmas presents,
while my family and friends open theirs in another time zone.
New Years?
I'll ring in the new year on a cash register,
and be back to coddle your hangovers in the morning.

Valentines Day?
I catered everyone else's date,
wondering when love became so expensive.
Presidents Day?
I will exchange Dead Presidents
for the luxuries and necessities of the living.
St Patrick's Day?
I made sure to wear green,
so as not to be pinched by random customers.

Easter Sunday?
I will listen to parents and children who are as confused
about the Spring Equinox as all the religions that appropriated it.
Cinco de Mayo?
I will watch Mexicans celebrate the independence of a country
many of them live in virtual exile from as refugees.
Independence Day?
I will hand out hamburgers to everyone who couldn't find a BBQ to attend,
while missing out on the one I was invited to.

Labor Day?
Surprise, surprise, I will spend this Bankers Holiday...
Laboring, what else?
Halloween?
I'll spend that final week listening to people bicker about costumes,
with noplace to go, even if I bothered to get one of my own.
But at least on Veteran's Day
I can be proud to serve
those who already have.

So at the end of each year, we find ourselves asking...
What holiday?

cincodemayo laborday presidentsday servicesector retailhell blackfriday christmas easter fastfood halloween holidays independenceday newyears newyearseve retail stpatricksday thanksgiving valentinesday veteransday

-12/14/15

My holidays are as lame as they are epic.

I've spent Hearthwarming in Thedas, gone deathclaw hunting in a nuclear winter wonderland, dragon hunting in scenic Skyrim, and even spent one very bipolar holiday in the Shivering Isles.

Yet this year, it looked like I wasn't going to find any new destinations, as I won't be able to get my hands on Fallout 4 for a long time yet to come.

But after getting this off my chest, I think I can finally take a creepy woodland holiday in the Sixth Dimension. I'll be sure to tell everyone all about it, after I'm finished writing Tradewinds 20.